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Could You Be Loved, And Be Loved?

We all want to be loved. From our families, a potential mate, and from our friends. I saw this last week when a lot of stories on adoption came through my reader. During this writing journey, I’m taking on a position that requires me to find insane and thought-provoking stories for a particular audience. I like shock factor so I figure this would be easy, but I didn’t know how much it would really affect me.

There was this story that was pretty popular around the internet a few weeks ago about Davion Only, a 15-year-old orphan who stood up and begged to be adopted by a family that wouldn’t just buy him the latest video games or clothes. He just wanted to be loved and cared for. Isn’t that what we all want? I was lucky enough that I didn’t have to grow up in the system but what about the children that are? After his story went viral, (hate that term) thousands of people are now wanting to give Only the only gift he wanted- a home.

I’d like to think that perhaps someone from his immediate family could have taken him in, not just tell him that his mom loved him but tried to defend her. As he begged to be taken in at church that day, he was surrounded by his birth parents family and his social worker. There were no takers, but that’s the mystery in the way things happen. When one door is closed, in time another one will open.

Adoption has always had a negative connotation with it. Just because we’re ‘adoptees’ doesn’t mean we’re angry, unstable  youths you see on the news.

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Some of the best leaders and entertainers were adopted like Bill Clinton, Faith Hill and Nelson Mandela. Yes Nelson Mandela. With over 400,000 children in foster homes in the U.S, just the thought that they can be the change the world needs makes me smile. We have the strength others may lack; we can adapt quickly to situations, are strong and courageous and won’t be defined by the term. Now with Only possibly having a home soon, I hope he gets to experience the best gift of all: family.

I’ve learned that my family is a reflective of who I am, physically we couldn’t look more different. I’ve gotten side-eyed more times at family functions than I can count. I know one thing: the weird faces I make when I hear horrible ideas, the way I dance, and my awesome cooking comes from them.

Hopefully Only and other adoptees will see that it isn’t about have a “real” mom or someone that looks like you to be family. You aren’t raised by one person, but everyone else around because the love is that strong. So could you be loved? Always. Can you love? Only if you’re open to it and no matter the situation, you should.

Let’s Do It Again

It’s 2 AM on a Friday night. The subway is filled with all types of after midnight marauders, as usual. While I’m sure that I look like the perfect bait for the potential rapist lurking, none of that matters right now. The joy and excitement I experienced with the other writers and  how happy my editors were for VIBE’s 20th Anniversary party was worth it. It was insane  for me not to think that the pages I use to highlight, bookmark and plaster on my walls would be one of the many jobs I have today.

New Rules

New Rules

I’ve always loved VIBE. Since I was kid it was one of my favorite magazines. It told the story of Hip Hop’s Golden Age, prolonged/investigated (debatable of course) the battle of East v. West Coast music, and followed the careers of the biggest names in Hip Hop today. I’ve always viewed Vibe as the journal of Hip Hop. It covered the high moments, the many lows, and where it’s heading today. While music will always reflect the many aspects of it’s historical past, we’re finally taking keen to the new artists who have found the perfect balance of homage and creating new sounds. (Insert your favorite artist here) It feels good to know that I can finally create some entries of my own.

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Two hours later I’m finally home, well not in my house but off the train. As I walk down the middle of the street (heels in hand) my flats are hugging my toes while I speed walk down the dark road. It’s late but I’m happy. I take risks everyday and this was nothing compared to the journey that had lead me to this point.

Cheers to print and the legacy that is Vibe. Let’s see what happens ten or 20 more years from now!

The Newbies

The Newbies

#AprilWritingChallenge (Days 8-11)

Here’s my second installment of the #ApriWritingChallenge. I just finished reading other awesome writers’ posts and they were pretty funny, dark, enlightening and far from what I expected. If you can scatter all of your thoughts into just a few sentences then you’ve earned your lucky stickers from me. No one can create or build an idea how you can, and I think that’s why I enjoy challenges like this.

Without further ado, 

Day 8

Black Is…

Black is pretty low on the totem pole of the Pantone Color chart. Black is the go to color for women to cover their imperfections. Black is ignored when I ask people their favorite colors. Black is forgotten in fashion.

Black will never be a negative.

Black goes with everything. Black is the color of our favorite lingerie. Black isn’t ignored when you talk about power. Everyone will remember how “black” every musical genre is. Black is you, me and how many people live. Don’t believe me? Check out how many other cultures are infatuated with African American culture. Don’t think we have an impact on the world? Take a look at the leaders, musicians, doctors, entertainers, mothers, and fathers that have inspired us and if you flip over that Pantone chart, Black is right on top- where it should be.

Day 9

I get upset when

(Now Playing: Shake It Out/Florence and The Machine)

I get upset when people give up. Challenges are the greatest gift ever bestowed on us. We’re able to analyze every possible way to conquer something that we believe is greater than us. While I dislike the challenges that swerve my way, I steer them smoothly so I can remember the tracks. You never want to repeat the same mistakes over again. Challenges are here to remind you why you strive for the best in your life. Giving up just shows that you don’t want that.  Florence Welch said it best “It’s hard to dance with the devil on your back,” how do you mange to forget that? You can’t complain and expect results if you don’t continue the fight. The best victories are expected when you know that you’ve pushed through it all. How can you be upset with a victory like that?

Day 10

This summer…

This summer will be better than the last. Don’t we all say this? There was nothing wrong with my 2012 summer, I got to see incredible acts on tour (Eric Prydz, Kendrick Lamar, Rockie Fresh, Wiz Khalifa) but I also spent my first summer in GA. Sure I was living there for a while, but I always skated away to the Big Apple every year. I enjoyed the summer streets of NYC so much that I ignored the gorgeous southern weather just to walk on hot concrete and  deal with angry tourists. Summer is GA doesn’t sound as pretty as “Summer in Miami” but it was an adventure. It looks as though this summer I got what I wanted. I’ll be scurrying the city looking for my big story and a (permanent) place of solitude. This summer will show me what I’m really made of and I’m definitely looking forward to that.

Day 11

I was shocked when…..

I was shocked when I met people like me. Why did it take so long? I guess you meet people in different musical montages of your life. In the beginning, while Byron Lee and The Dragonieers (look it up) bonded my sisters and I in a calypso dream, today I’m thrown for a loop between my old friends and new while J. Cole’s “Power Trip” blares from my iTunes for the 5th time today. It’s always a delight meeting people and creating memories with the ones who matter. I was shocked that about the time frame, but I couldn’t be happier about the new people who are in my life. They’re all incredible talented folks who probably jam as hard to J.Cole as I do.

#AprilWritingChallenge (Days 1-7)

As Kanye West’ “Late” plays 

 

So my homie Stacy suggested that I should join the #AprilWritingChallenge. Of course I would be the one to start super late, so here’s the first week in one conveniently informative post. Enjoy!

Day 7

The most annoying celebrity is…

The most annoying celebrity is the one who doesn’t deserve of the title. I can’t be annoyed by someone I don’t genuinely know. I can be aware of the many talents artists and actors may hold but if you want to be famous for fame then that’s plain ridiculous. What do you bring to the table? Even Kim Kardashian changed her image and had people talking about her fashion and family before they remembered images of her taking backshots from this dude.

Celebrity is a title many don’t want. Isn’t that kind of annoying in itself? We want to know these people so bad we invade their space, we dissect every sip of wine, tweet, song, movie choice, endorsement and we get mad when they’re all over magazines? Make up your mind America. 

 

Day 6 

At 40, I want…

At 40 I want my tween kids jam out to the oldies. You know, Miguel, Frank Ocean, Usher, Michael Jackson, and ZZ Hill. I’ll be making dinner after a long day at the office. I’m always on my feet, but I love my work and my family. My husband will try to help in the kitchen and I’ll watch him as he puts too much butter on the broccoli. I’ll laugh and remove it as he walks away. Sundays are our big family dinner feasts with my sisters and their children. We’ll all catch up as we watch the little versions of ourselves dance around, fall in and out of love, and find what they’re good at. It will take a while, but so does parenting. I’ll pass by my home office and not worry about deadlines and business trips because I’ll be at peace. As I twirl my very short curls  around my fingers, I notice that I have everything I’ve ever wanted. I’ll grin while everyone rushes me to serve dinner. They’re hungry and I’m the only one who knows how to work the compact oven. 40 is the new 40 and it feels great. 

 

Day 5

If I won a billion dollars…

If I won a billion dollars, this is what I will do:

I wouldn’t retrieve it all, because I would pick the monthly/yearly checks. I want to be able to work and appreciate the money I get. I would pay my student loans while eating a 50.00 apple. I would give to my family, but they will not milk me. I would donate to those who can’t help themselves. I would buy Lupe Fiasco’s royalties just to give them to him (I want to hear what the REAL Lasers sounds like gosh darnit!) I would pay someone teach me different languages so I can travel the world. I would buy a house for my children, but they will know what hard work is. I would buy Def Jam and make it hot like it was so many years ago. I would do so much, but I when I leave mother earth, I would make sure whatever money is left will go to the greater good.

 

Day 4

In a perfect world…

In a perfect world, everyone has a theme song. It plays as they prepare for the day and walk down the street. They are essentially happy and unique. Everyone is thoughtful and mindful of the next man. We’re all understanding of our differences and manage to share our gum. We’re knowledgeable, but not ‘know-it-all’s.’ We’re passionate, but not violent. We respect each other, but aren’t disappointed when we change. In a perfect world, we don’t belittle each other, we build each other up. Our theme songs are all different but Pharrell , Timbaland, 9th Wonder created them in their supergroup. I think that’s why everyone is so damn happy. It’s cool though because in this perfect world there are imperfect notions that help it go round. 

 

Day 3

Dear future wife/husband… 

Dear future husband- How you livin? While you’re off on your journey, I want to let you know that you are far from my brain. Okay, that didn’t come out right. *Gently grabs your hands* I’m living out my dreams and figuring out who I am. Cliché right? Let me explain. I can’t look forward to meeting you when I’m learning little tidbits about myself. I hope the ladies you’ve dated don’t jade you or change you from being you. In my 23 years of living on planet Earth, I’ve been committed to other human(s) since I was 15. These boys/men have taught me about what I like and what I don’t want, how to care for a man, but ignore a boy. But they couldn’t help me be me. Understand that I’m doing that today, (the biggest delay other than Community coming back…wait you watched that show too? #sixseasonsandamovie) and I hope you’re doing the same. I know I want to be the best version of myself for you because when I walk down that aisle, I’m yours for good. Hope you’re ready for me good lookin.

 

Day 2 

I fear…

I fear the person I will become in 10 years. Why? Because she will be stronger, wiser, and dedicated to whatever she puts her mind to. What’s scary about that you ask? I’m a pretty tough cookie in my 20’s. I often get mistaken for someone older because of my maturity and my journey in life thus far. I’ve learned from time to time you have to give yourself props when no one else does. I make sure to do this when necessary. I know the woman I’ll become will see the person I am today and laugh at the situations I put myself in and the shenanigans I’ll ensue as I fight for what’s rightfully mine. The anxiety I feel about this person is beyond thought and words. I know when I do meet her, that fear will disappear. 

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Day 1 

I contradict myself when…

I contradict myself when I forgive. When you forgive someone, you give them a free pass to do whatever they want. Believe it or not, they’ve studied you through the years; they know what makes you mad, confused, bitter and most importantly what makes you happy. The contradiction lies where the mistakes start to happen again. You tell yourself that you wouldn’t let certain scenarios happen to you-until they happen. I never imagined that being a nice person can have such a backlash the way it does, but you live and you learn. I’ve learned that I can only forgive one person, myself. If I stub my toe, I can say “Be careful next time girfrann,” or if I take on too much work, I can’t be upset when it doesn’t get done. I can only forgive and move on, but then again I contradict myself once again when I do that. 

 

 

 

Hello World (Lupe voice)

This is an introduction-right? Let’s skip over that while you indulge in some of my thoughts. While your jumping in between tabs, I’d like to welcome you to my online-humble-abode. All you need to know (for right now at least) is that I enjoy what I do. Well we skipped the intro so you’ll have to figure it out through my posts. 

Just kidding. 

Today, there isn’t just one “thing” that we do as careers. People have different talents, strengths and jobs. So if you were forced to watch a lifetime movie about myself, you would know that I’m a writer who has a love for music and covering the news. At this point of the film, a young racially ambiguous Persia White is playing myself when I’m in my intern days at Vibe Magazine.

Pretty cool right?

Astro

 

She’s left her family and friends in Atlanta to come back to her hometown to pursue her dreams. Don’t change the channel yet- there’s fun friendships, side jobs and, musical montages to watch. 

Welcome to The Cool.

-Desire