Pages In The Mind

Pledge Allegiance To The Struggle

December is crazy month for everyone.

We’re either rambling about finals, work or questionable anxiety when you’ve done nothing with yourself this year the nerves set in. We’ve heard it all before. I’ve realized that I’m not apart of that bunch anymore and it’s a great feeling. (Insert confetti)

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This doesn’t mean that we have it all together. There will always be moments when life kicks the mess out of you, but that’s when the thinking cap comes on and you figure it out. 2013 was the year I fell into my personality and was finally able to be comfortable with myself. Friends, money and opportunities came and went in the process, but the worst situations deliver the best blessings.

I can’t pin point any struggle that was the absolute worst. Maybe it was the time I jumped the turnstile in heels with my laptop, or getting creative with just 10 bucks worth of groceries, or watching someone steal my words and claim them as their own, but they are moments that will stick with me for the long haul.

Dreams aren’t easy to achieve, this isn’t something teachers tell you when your picking your career. It’s something you find out for yourself. If you don’t suffer from some kind of struggle how do you learn?

So salute to all the peeps who are fighting for their dreams. Never wallow in your own disappointment.

Remember that it all amounts to something greater, maybe even bigger than you imagined.

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Make it yours. I know I will make it mine.

Could You Be Loved, And Be Loved?

We all want to be loved. From our families, a potential mate, and from our friends. I saw this last week when a lot of stories on adoption came through my reader. During this writing journey, I’m taking on a position that requires me to find insane and thought-provoking stories for a particular audience. I like shock factor so I figure this would be easy, but I didn’t know how much it would really affect me.

There was this story that was pretty popular around the internet a few weeks ago about Davion Only, a 15-year-old orphan who stood up and begged to be adopted by a family that wouldn’t just buy him the latest video games or clothes. He just wanted to be loved and cared for. Isn’t that what we all want? I was lucky enough that I didn’t have to grow up in the system but what about the children that are? After his story went viral, (hate that term) thousands of people are now wanting to give Only the only gift he wanted- a home.

I’d like to think that perhaps someone from his immediate family could have taken him in, not just tell him that his mom loved him but tried to defend her. As he begged to be taken in at church that day, he was surrounded by his birth parents family and his social worker. There were no takers, but that’s the mystery in the way things happen. When one door is closed, in time another one will open.

Adoption has always had a negative connotation with it. Just because we’re ‘adoptees’ doesn’t mean we’re angry, unstable  youths you see on the news.

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Some of the best leaders and entertainers were adopted like Bill Clinton, Faith Hill and Nelson Mandela. Yes Nelson Mandela. With over 400,000 children in foster homes in the U.S, just the thought that they can be the change the world needs makes me smile. We have the strength others may lack; we can adapt quickly to situations, are strong and courageous and won’t be defined by the term. Now with Only possibly having a home soon, I hope he gets to experience the best gift of all: family.

I’ve learned that my family is a reflective of who I am, physically we couldn’t look more different. I’ve gotten side-eyed more times at family functions than I can count. I know one thing: the weird faces I make when I hear horrible ideas, the way I dance, and my awesome cooking comes from them.

Hopefully Only and other adoptees will see that it isn’t about have a “real” mom or someone that looks like you to be family. You aren’t raised by one person, but everyone else around because the love is that strong. So could you be loved? Always. Can you love? Only if you’re open to it and no matter the situation, you should.